The Burning

Okay so I just got back inside my apartment. At around 11:40 pm the fire alarm went off and boy is it loud. At first I was like whatever and I peeked out my door and I didn't see anyone else leaving. (which shouldn't matter, I mean why would I judge my safety based on others' actions) But then I smelled smoke and I freaked. All I could think was get my laptop and grab my books. I can't lose my notes. So I scrambled to pack my backpack. In retrospect that was rather dumb. I mean if there really was a fire I could've been trapped upstairs because I wanted to do well on finals. And we do have a fire escape but I'm not sure in a panic I could figure out how to drop the last ladder down to the street. Plus it looks kinda rusty. But luckily for me it was just a scare, someone burned something, probably food. I did appreciate that within a few minutes of us calling 911, 6 fire trucks/engines showed up. Boy do I feel safe in case of a real emergency. Thanks firefighters you are awesome!!!

On a side note I took out my phone and wanted to take a picture of all the firefighters and trucks and a girl next to me said "you must be Arab. Only Arabs take pictures of that shit." Ummm okay. Gotta love stereotypes, sometimes they are so random.

I surrender

I think I've just about given up on this blog. Talk about writer's block. I've lost my sense of humor somewhere in the city, probably in a public restroom. Oh well. I tried.

Oscar & Denzel sittin' in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g

I cannot wait to see Denzel's new movie, American Gangster. Looks frickin awesome. Only it's probably so awesome that he will be nominated for an Academy Award. Great for him, bad for Black people. They only time a Black person will ever win (for Best Actor/Actress) is when they play bad guys or dirty crack whores (hello Halle). But what if Denzel performs fantabulously and he deserves an Oscar? Well they won't give it to him, why? Cause the Academy doesn't wanna seem racist, which only means they are. Damn you whitey, damn you.

Best DJ ever

My brother, D Money, is the BEST DJ in Davis. You should listen to his show, Walk with Me. They play true hip hop. To hear his DJing genius, near the top left, click the mp3 stream right underneath "miss this show".

Cheaters never propser II

All I can say is WOW Marion Jones, wow.

Forgive me

I swear guys I'm gonna start blogging again, but I've been so busy, but I will I promise. I think Bri and Jaz will beat me up if I don't.

On a side note, its almost the one year anniversary of the blog - October 10th, Yeah!!!!

WARNING: the following post is NSFW.

Scroll down carefully.





Don't say I didn't warn you.

Eat your veggies. They're good for you

Anorexia is not a good look.

This is an Italian billboard created to raise awareness about anorexia.

Please whoop yo' kids

If I have to see one more punk ass kid throwing a tantrum in the store cause he can't get something he wants I'm gonna flip out. Bad ass kids running all over the place, blocking the aisle, bumping into me, all the while his mother doesn't know what the hell to do. Seriously its too much. We wouldn't have this problem if people would beat their kids. I know in this day and age spanking is sometimes frowned upon. But let me tell you a good ass whoopin' will straighten your child out. Most people [whitey] who are against spanking do that time out crap.

"Little Tommy, you stop calling your mother a slut. Tommy do you hear me talking to you? What would Jesus do Tommy? Thats it Tommy I'm counting to 5. 1...2...Tommy I'm counting...3...Tommy can you hear me...4...You're gonna get it Tommy...4 ½ ...4 ¾ ...4 7/8...5. Thats it Tommy, get in the corner for 2 minutes." Then Tommy flips Mommy off and starts playing his Xbox. Fast forward 7 years later, little Tommy is burning animals in the backyard for fun and little Tommy's sister is sleeping with the football team and she's not even a cheerleader. My advice, whoop your kids.

Oh and if you [whitey] are sensitive about spanking then go to this site and it can coach you until you're strong enough to whoop on your own.

It is almost time

Cheaters shouldn't prosper

Got Milk?

God Bless America

I am so glad I live in a time and place where people have the freedom and technology to voice their opinions about important matters.

Have you noticed...

Why do houses in tv shows always have a swinging door. I don't think I've ever been in a house with a swinging door. People are always getting hit by the door. Seems dangerous...

I gave in...

There I finally did it. I joined Facebook. I'm shocked at myself. Normally I am against all these sites: MySpace, Facebook, and who knows what else. I don't like the idea of people going to a website to look at pictures of me. Unless you're my parents you don't need your own private collection of pictures of me. Why did I join Facebook you ask. It was an impulse decision. I've been wondering what all the hoopla was about. Now I know.....nothing.

My account status: I have one friend, a few applications for friends pending. I am pitiful. Making friends in real life is hard enough, but applying to be someone's friend? What if they reject me? I'm not ready for this kind of internet dumping. I have no pictures so all thats under my name is a giant question mark, as if I'm not even a real person. No wonder no one wants to be my friend...

Complaining Ass People

What is wrong with people? The iPhone price has been cut from $599 to $399 and now people who bought it for $599 are upset. They are complaining about how they got gypped. I say, thats what your dumb ass gets. If you buy technology when it first comes out, of course its gonna cost more and have bugs in it. Thats what you get for being an early adopter. You should be like me and wait a while before purchasing, until the technology is old and nobody wants it, then its hella cheap. You know I just got a Super Nintendo. I bet you paid like $200 for yours. I got mines for $20. Beat that bitches!

-Signed, Saving up for a walkman

Krakatoa

Woohoo, or so I thought...

Ever since the advent of low rise pants, the world has been forced to stare at ass crack after ass crack. And initially one might think this could be a beautiful thing, but in reality, not everyone has a pretty ass crack.

Real cracks, can be crooked, ashy, and crusty, among other things. Its gotten so bad, people are making laws against all this crackage. But I digress. The point is ever since these pants were invented, I have had a hard time finding regular rise pants, unless you shop in the old lady department, and I sir, am not an old lady. So I have had to suffer, the purchasing of long t-shirts, making sure to sit in chairs with backs, strategically bending to tie my shoes (thank god for double knots). I have been living in fear that someone will see my crack at any moment. Which leads me to the present. I went to Old Navy after hearing they had regular rise pants [woohoo] BUT these lame-o pants start out as classic rise, and even with a belt, as you start walking, down they slide. I'm back to a low rise world.

I'm beginning to think its not the pants but my complete and utter lack of an ass. It makes sense scientifically. Jeans are heavy material and are kept in place by a belt and your buttocks. If, like me, your butt is flat, then the jeans have nothing to grip onto, and down they go, the belt only protects you from being pantsed. So, really my only choices are to either destroy gravity, get a butt augmentation, or suck it up and buy old lady jeans with an elastic waistband and tapered legs. Guess which one I'm going to pick...

Think you're smart? Prove it!

Remember how we were all traumatized by The Impossible Quiz? Well I've got something else for you. A bit of a brain teaser, but I promise, it is solvable, although I have yet to solve it. I'll post the answer as soon as I figure it out, I just refuse to cheat.

Good Luck my friends and I'm sorry for giving you a new addiction.

Everybody has to Cross the River [The River IQ Game]

Yes its in Japanese, but here are the instructions:

• Only 2 persons on the raft at a time
• The father can not stay with any of the daughters without their mother's presence
• The mother can not stay with any of the sons without their father's presence
• The thief (striped shirt) can not stay with any family member if the Policeman is not there
• Only the Father, the Mother and the Policeman know how to operate the raft

To start click on the big blue circle on the right.
To move the people click on them. To move the raft click on the pole on the opposite side of the river.

It begins...

UPDATE: Here is the answer. Highlight it to read it.

Remember this is one of 2 options. For the other answer switch the girls for the boys and Mom for Dad.

1. Cop & Thief
2. Cop
3. Cop & Girl 1
4. Cop & Thief
5. Mom & Girl 2
6. Mom
7. Mom & Dad
8. Dad
9. Cop & Thief
10. Mom
11. Dad & Mom
12. Dad
13. Dad & Son 1
14. Cop & Thief
15. Cop & Son 2
16. Cop
17. Cop & Thief

This makes me feel smart

Konichiwa bitches! I am back. Hope you had a good summer, I didn't. Grrr. I may tell you all about it, but thats a convo for another day. Today, we mock people. Like this dumdum here. Enjoy.

Grape Juice anyone?